Spinning: Suzanne Vega - Caramel
I haven't blogged for a long time. And yes, it's because I was in a rather pensive mood over these few days. You could probably guess why. Hint #1: 2 days ago I was a harried student waiting for my O Level results. Hint #2: I did okay, not impressive but yet not disastrous. 2 days ago I went through what you could call the 2nd event in your life which is liable to give you a heart attack. The receiving of the GCE 'O' Level results. The 1st event in your life that may give you a heart attack? The receiving of the PSLE results. The only difference is that at 12, you were much more innocent, and much more ignorant of the implications of your good/bad results. So you probably wouldn't care less if you did badly or did well, it would be your parents who would jump up and down, either in anger or excitement. At 17, you're much wiser and aware of what kind of crap shitty results would land you in. So you worry more. Why grow old? Don't ask me. I think it's fantastic to be young and innocent. Just too bad, we can't fight the forces of nature.
I took the path less trodden when I entered JC. I took the Arts path, which a lot, and I say that again - a lot - of people look down upon. I do not like people who look down upon Arts students. If it wasn't for the fact that typing fullstops in between the former statement and typing all of it in caps would make my blog look really stupid, I.WOULD.HAVE.DONE.SO! Here, the Arts stream academic requirements are lower. Besides that, Science stream students have more options when they go to University (i.e Arts students have the door to Science careers slammed in their face when they reach University). Granted, that would make the Science stream VERY attractive, BUT that does not give society an excuse to wag their finger at Arts students and say, 'You're a bunch of mediocre students'. They don't say it of course, some actually hint at that perception. But it's enough to develop a kind of inferiority in some Arts students. Maybe I have it; if I do, I'm not aware. One of my lecturers actually said that Arts students were less focused than Science students. Since young, kids are encouraged to 'go for the Science stream 'cos it's a more lucrative field and it makes you LOTS OF LOTS OF money.' I've even heard things like, 'Don't go for the Arts Stream!!! You'd be a fool to go there.' What am I, a present Arts student, supposed to think? So I made a mistake in secondary school, did badly for my Sec 2 exams, ended up in double science stream, at O levels I didn't do well enough to get into Science, but, AH, I realize I have a flair in the arts/humanities field. What I'm trying to say is: I don't like how the Arts stream is being perceived right now. I don't like stereotypical statements, nor do I like generalizations. Maybe it's because I myself am an Arts student. Whatever it is, I'm going to attempt to prove them wrong. Though I seriously suspect that one Arts student made good wouldn't convince them to change their age old perception of 'Science is better, Arts is just.. uhg.' I'm not saying Science is not good. I'm saying that the Arts stream deserves a little more respect.
I got a raw score of 11 at the O levels, and bonus points of 4. By many people's standards, my results were AVERAGE, or below average, if you will. Just ask my family doctor, who gave me that shocked look and whose mouth dropped wide open when he heard I'd gotten 13 for my prelims (bonus 4). Following which he cried, "What happened?!" How did I react? I just stared at him. I was too shocked to reply. I hadn't expected THAT kind of reaction from him. It was as if I had failed my prelims terribly, if you know what I mean. Just a little background info: His son is from RI and had gotten a raw score of 7 for his prelims. Admittedly, he is an extremely smart and hardworking boy. But that doesn't give the doctor an excuse to give SUCH A EXAGGERATING REACTION towards my score. Do you know how hurt I felt when he did that? It was as if he was treating me like a failure in life. Later on that hurt turned into anger. I was so furious, I shed a few tears when I exited the clinic. My sister was there as well. You know what was destroyed here? My pride. Yes, my pride. As stupid as it may sound. I promised that I would never come back to his clinic again unless I got a reasonable score of, say, 8. At least. Now my results are 11. But I've changed my mind. I'm going back there (the next time I ever get sick), and if he asks, I'll tell the truth. I find no point in hiding the truth from him. So what if it's a 'below average' score? At least I KNOW I have tried my best, and it's time to move on.
It's no point feeling hurt and angry over his reaction. It's time for some self-motivation. I want to prove him wrong. I know, it's wrong to be motivated by anger, and spite. But I feel the need to actually... shut him up eventually. And if I ever succeed in doing that, I'm telling him that results aren't everything.
1 comments
1 Comments:
that doctor is such an ass. i mean like, hello? not everyone is ri material. oh hahhas and YAH so wad if science students are more focused etc. if they are focused, she should pay more attention to us and help us rather than criticize right? oops am i leaking too much information? hahhas. oh wells, arts isnt a bad thing lohs. why torture urself with science when u can do better in arts or when u know tht your future will never revolve around any science-related job? its more about finding your potential and excelling rather and blindly following what is deemed 'better' by the society.
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